Sunday, March 08, 2009

HP Customer Service By Chat

Update on my HP Chat experience. The call never came. E-mails at bottom.
My mom has been having problems with her new printer/fax/scanner/phone. So after messing around with it I decided to try to get an RMA from HP. They have a feature where you can "chat" with someone online. I think it said you get instant customer service. I'm copying and pasting the chat as we go. No wonder so many companies are going under.

I don't blame this on Chandra. It falls on our friends at HP. The process is designed to take so long and be so difficult that some people will just give up. Great for building customer loyalty.
My HP Chat is below - I abbreviated Chandra's name to minimize any impact on him/her:

Warren Redlich :
HP LaserJet M1319f MFP -- Handset unable to make phone calls. Picking incoming call receives, but cannot hear caller. Fax does not send/receive. Want RMA. Purchased 12/08.

[An agent will be with you shortly.]

[You are now chatting with Chandra PP .]

Warren Redlich : Hello.

Chandra PP :
Hello, Warren.

Warren Redlich :
Can I get an RMA?

Chandra PP :
Welcome to HP Total Care Chat Support for Imaging & Printing Group. My name is Chandra. Please give me a minute while I review the issue description.

Warren Redlich : How are we doing?

Chandra PP :
Could you please tell me what RMA stands for?

Warren Redlich : Return Merchandise Authorization - so I can send it back to HP and you can send me a new one.

Warren Redlich :
Are you still there?

Warren Redlich :
Sorry, I mean you send us a new one and we ship this one back to you in the box you sen dto us.

Warren Redlich :
Is this chat supposed to be this slow?

Warren Redlich :
You see, in a normal conversation you would type something back to me.

Chandra PP :
You may experience a lag in response while your interaction, due to server maintenance. The inconvenience caused to you is deeply regretted.

Warren Redlich : We've been on this chat for 8 minutes and you have asked me one question.

Warren Redlich :
Sorry, 9 minutes.

Chandra PP : Warren, may i know is the printer connected to the dedicated phone line or from any other device?

Warren Redlich : Dedicated line

Warren Redlich :
I plugged a phone into the secondary phone jack and it worked fine.

Warren Redlich : 14 minutes now.

Warren Redlich : How long do your records show this chat has taken?

Chandra PP : Warren, as this is known issue with this prooduct, so I am going to create a service ticket against this product. So, I need some information , you will receive a call back to get the issue resolved.

Warren Redlich : I don't know what that means.

Warren Redlich : I think we're at 20 minutes now.

Warren Redlich : You see, I'm at my mom's house for a birthday dinner. It's my birthday. Instead of enjoying time with my family, I'm doing this with you. Why is it taking so long?

Chandra PP : I mean that we would replace the printer, for that we need some information.

Warren Redlich : Then you should probably start asking me some questions, as we are now 22 minutes into this chat.

Chandra PP : Please let me know the contact number?

Warren Redlich : My cell phone is 518-xxx-xxxx [I gotta have some privacy]

Warren Redlich : 25 minutes now, unless you have a different view of how long this has taken.

Chandra PP : Any alternate number if any?

Warren Redlich : Sure. My office phone is 518-862-1877 x108
Chandra PP : Warren I apologise for the inconvience but it would take some time to create the service ticket.

Chandra PP : Alright.

Warren Redlich : I don't understand what you mean.

Warren Redlich : 28 minutes

Warren Redlich : You're not going to disagree with me on the length of time, are you?

Warren Redlich : 31 minutes

Warren Redlich : Am I supposed to keep waiting or are we done?

Warren Redlich : We started this chat at 4:47 pm. It's 5:21 pm now. I think dinner is almost ready. What's going on?

Chandra PP : I agree that its too long to reply, I really apologise for the inconvience, You may experience a lag in response while your interaction, due to server maintenance. The inconvenience caused to you is deeply regretted.

Warren Redlich :
It's just short of 40 minutes now. I'm going to sit down for dinner and I'll come back when dinner is finished. You may experience a lag in response in your interaction, due to nutritional abuse. The inconvenience caused to you is not at all regretted.

Chandra PP : Now please let me know the Serial number of the printer.

Warren Redlich : CNCZ84K0XM

Chandra PP : Warren, I again apologise for the delay.

Warren Redlich : I don't think it's your fault. I blame HP.

Chandra PP : Please let me know your physical address .

Warren Redlich : 255 Washington Ave. Ext.; Suite 108; Albany, NY 12205

Chandra PP : Please let me know the appropriate time to call you.

Warren Redlich : You can call me anytime between 8 am and 8 pm any day of the week, Eastern (New York) time.

Warren Redlich : 45 minutes now.

Chandra PP : thank you for the information.

Chandra PP :
Please let me know when did this issue occur?

Warren Redlich :
It stopped working properly about a month ago (roughly February 1st).

Chandra PP : Okay.

Chandra PP : Did you registered this product earlier?

Warren Redlich :
I don't know if we registered the product.

Chandra PP : Okay.

Chandra PP : What is your email address?

Warren Redlich :

Warren Redlich : What's yours?

Warren Redlich : Over 50 minutes now.

Chandra PP :
I apologize, as we are in chat technical support we do not have email address.

Chandra PP : It will take another 5 minutes.

Warren Redlich :
Dinner really is ready now. I'll be back in less time than this chat has taken.

Chandra PP : Okay. You can go over and end this, I will send you the service ticket number through email.

Chandra PP :
Will it be convenient for you?

Warren Redlich :
email is great

Chandra PP : Befor you end this chat, please let me know the windows operating system you are using in your system?

Warren Redlich :
Mac OS X

Warren Redlich : About 55 minutes now. I did step away for 2 minutes there.

Chandra PP : I understand the inconvenience caused to you and I sincerely apologize for this. Let me assure you that in future you will not face this issue.

Chandra PP :
Is there anything else, I may assist you?

Warren Redlich : Not at this time. I'll look forward to your e-mail.

Chandra PP : I will make sure that you receive the call within 48 hours.

Chandra PP :
Please note the reference number: 1416130 for this chat session.

Chandra PP : Thank you for contacting HP Total Care Real-Time chat support. If you need further assistance, please contact us again at:
Chat support is available 24 hrs a day, 7 days a week.
Stay connected and protected with HP's new online storage and sharing service, HP online. To try it FREE for one year, please visit:
For information on keeping your HP and Compaq products up and running, please visit our Web site at:

As mentioned in the update, the call never came.

I e-mailed twice and got the following responses:



Hi Warren,

Thank you for writing back to us and providing us an opportunity to serve you again in this matter. I apologize for the inconvenience caused.

Warren, I would like to inform you that the case has already been forwarded to HP Technical
support and they were unable to contact you due to technical difficulties, I have just now informed them and they assured me that they will call you at the earliest.

If you need any assistance or if you have any questions, please get back to us. We are always available round the clock to assist you technically regarding the issue you may experience with All-in-One units.


HP Total Care
and 3/13:

Hello Warren,

Thank you for writing back to us. I am glad to assist you further.

I understand from your email that you did not contacted yet by our call back team. I regret for the inconvenience this might have caused to you.

Warren, I once again personally forwarding your details to the concerned department and they would be contacting you at the earliest.

I hope the above information should answer your query, however if you need additional help, please reply to this email I shall be glad in assisting you further anytime.

We are available round the clock to assist valuable customers like you.

Have a nice day.

HP Total Care.


OpusMark said...

I think I would've ripped the phone out of the wall at minute 38...

Unknown said...

Composing the blog post was therapeutic.

Steve said...

I wonder how many different chat conversations that one representative was handling at one time.

HP, you've made a very poor impression of your customer service. My desktop (both at work and at home) and my printer are HP products. I buy HP because their products work great with Linux. This report on their customer service is troubling.


Bubbe said...

After trying since the beginning of February to get my fax and phone working, I was ready to dump the almost new machine in the trash. The long call with India, other phone calls, endless e-mails, the machine was fixed in about one minute. The cable guy was here and he fixed it. So much for Hewlett Packard Customer Service!!

Anonymous said...

If you ask me, you had it easy.
Ive just spent two weekend over 3 weeks on HP's chat lines with even worse consequences. I bought my 11 yr old a Pavillion notebook for his birthday (so still under guarantee) I bought it early to set it all up. Their in built backup to hard disk partition D: dont work.... hey ho: I'll save to dvd disk instead. It has an in built BluRay DVD player. It will play normal DVDs but not BluRay disks. Ive spoken to at least 5 HP 'technicians'. Don't be fooled, theyre 'Remember me on this site' tick box doesnt remember, so every time you have to fill in all the same product, serial no, blood group details. I think the thing that gets right up my nose is that theyre so apologetic and apologising.... its cringeworthy. Dont keep saying sorry, JUST MEND THE THING! Anyway after a weekend of typing they decided the disc player was faulty.... courier to the menders.... wait 10 days.... computer returns with reassuring hand signed in ink, test data assuring me the drive has been replaced and its all tickety boo.....NOT !! Chat chat.... after 2 hrs doing the bleeding obvious the guy says do a system restore....'Im so velly velly sorry for your trouble, but trust me Mr Alan, this WILL work'. Of course I have to sign off our chat session to do the restore... OK F11 restore.... Crash! Error 0x400 100 abc xyz Please call HP Support. Hmm, lets try recovering from the original backup disks.....crash, same message.... back to Chat...... Crash. 'Sorry can't connect... unexpected error on server, please try later, then even later' Its his birthday tomorrow and Im gonna look like the loser Dad of the year!!! ....AAAAAARGGHH!!!
DELL was soooo much better... why did I did I believe that line HP Total(ly) Care (less).

Oh I forgot, the printer wouldnt work till I replaced it three times...bad batch I was told.

If you need a decent backup service BUY DELL or Advent or an abacus. ANTHING other than this
H eap of P ooh!


Anonymous said...

HP DEskjet F380 AIO printer will not print MS Office documents. All other types of documents and pictures print ok. All other printer functions also work ok. A google search indicates this is a universal problem with HP AIO printers. My contacts with HP customer service by phone, chat and e-mail have been very lengthy, frustrating and totally useless. Nothing they suggested has solved the problem. Latest advise is to sign-up for a HP service contract and then an experienced technical service rep will get in touch with me and help correct MY errors when installing the device. What gall. The customer service reps I have been in touch with know little to nothing about computer functions and what they are recommending as corrective actions. Shame on HP.

Anonymous said...

OMG!!! I experienced almost an identical chat with HP! It was so frustrating that I wanted to pull my hair out but kept hanging on because I didn't want the last hour of my life to be for nothing! PS- my HP fax still does not work!

Anonymous said...

Wow I am having the exact problem with hp right now!!!!!!!! I bought a pc and the adapter stopped working properly....leaving my computer unable to run. According to a customer service rep it was due to the charger insufficiency. They told me I would receive a new charger (under warranty being that the computer is not even a yr old) within a week. Well it didnt show up. I took the time to make a phone call to hp where they gave me not only the run around and sent me to TEN different operators etc, but a fake customer service number. This fun experience took an hour and a half of my time and left me with no resolution. I know the order has been "placed", but as far as when and if I will receive it is a mystery. Never again will I buy any HP product!!!! Maybe instead of spending all of their profits on celebrity spokesmen, they should invest in something called "service".

Anonymous said...

i knew i wasn't the only one you would think chatting would be more instantaneos ? my dvd drive stopped being recognized , I'm glad i bought a three year warranty from best buy with accidentle coverage
when the 2 and half mark come i'm returning it for a new one or whtever is the latest replacemenT
this is crazy they don't even have the drivers for the dvd rom on their site I could fix it myself being i'm pretty knowledgable with computers but no . I had to turn my computer upside down and chat with a slow tech which i really doubt they are. the enter basic info you gave into a program and guess what's the solutions

Anonymous said...

Dear sir, in my computer some problem that, some program ,when i am opening then it is showing microsoft windows problem so i have this problem .What i could do please give me some ideas for this problem i am waiting for your message thanks..............

Unknown said...

Dear Anonymous: I'm a lawyer, not a computer technician. Suggest you contact someone who has that skill set.

amanda said...

please help my HP wont let run regular, it only lets me run in safe mode. I need help what do I do ????

bharath said...

sir i have a problem with my hard disk the problem is when i press the start button it came like:smart hard disk error the smart hard disk has detected an imminent failure what shouid i do now?

Unknown said...

i bought a set of recovery disc from hp on chargeable basis to recover my computer as factory condition.but the recovery process is not performed from that personal technicians said that discs are damaged. i need help or a service to recover my computer as factory condition.